Risaunyer mama nak g umrah.....

I wish aku leh pegi ngan mama g umrah tp susah la...laki aku cemaner kalo aku takder...nasib adik aku lg sorg ikut...cemaner la kalau mama dah gi...kene jadi org gaji la aku utk 2 minggu nih...hmm...aku harap2 mama berubah lah lepas balik umrah nanti...aku risau gak tapi nak buat cemaner...aku pun nak jage adik aku yang 2 org tuh...kang kelaparan la plak...ari ahad ni,20 hb nak anta mama....macam cepat jek mase....Semoga sumenyer berjalan dengan baik dan dapat keberkatan dari Allah S.W.T. Amin!

What are you most afraid in Life?

Firstly,I'm afraid of losing Love from all of the people around me....i'm afraid of Losing Myself,my BFF, my families and my Hubby...and i'm afraid of feeling Lonely...That's the most difficult things that i couldn't avoid..People keep asking me about this but still i dun have an answer yet till the last couple of weeks, i try to spend a lil bit time for myself..and i understand 1 thing....that's what i felt all this while actually...before this,i'm not focus enough about everything that happened around me...Now i understand....i'm glad...:)

Sometimes aku rase macam nak menjerit!!

arini memang bad day at work..bayangkanla,,,sume keje nak pass kat aku,,pastu bile document hilang ker aper ker,,,salahkan aku,,,padahal aku dah arrangekan sumer...die bole plak nak salahkan aku balik,,,die ingat aku robot ker nak ingat sumer,,,sume org banyak keje beb,,,aku smpi tak leh nak focus ngan keje aku sendiri...aku tak tau ler beraper lame aku leh bertahan keje cam nih...adduuiiii....

Happy Eid Mubarak BFF! Just a piece of my heart Feeling...

Wish you all Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri...Mintak maap kalau ade salah dan silap sepanjang perkenalan kiter...mane tau kalau ader terase ati ker..kekadang tak perasan ler...hehhee..kalau rajin,,jemput ler ke rumah aku yer....

this year 1st time aku celebrate dengan husband aku,,,well,,it's fun though cuz rase cam lain la..tak mcm before nih,,and aku kene balik kampung die kat pontian...well,,not say that its not fun cume aku belum biase lagi...and its not easy to fit in la..aku menghadapi simpton sosial sekarang nih,,hahaha...aku tak tau ah...aku ok ngan family in law aku n sedare2 husben aku cume kekadang tu tak tau sey nak bebual aper...so,in the end,,im left out alone,,,buat bodoh jek ah,,,

aku frust gak ngan hubby aku,,,kekadang tinggalkan aku sorg2..menyirap gak ah,,,aku banyak kali gak try bebual ngan pakcik2 die,,,cousin2 die tp kekadang tuh termati jap..tetibe mute,,hahhahah,,,and aku pun tak paham ngan my MIL...samada die tak reti nak layan new family member die ker,,,anti sosial ngan aku ker,,,i dunno...im totally blur with her,,,n die buat aku rase "die suke ker tak suke ngan aku nih..",,,mase kat pontian mmg aku rase cam sedih ah cuz takde org layan,,cuz they all janganla expect yang aku nih boleh cepat mesra,,aku susah ah,,kene take time...then my MIL bole cam wat2 tak nmpk aku..ntah ah,,,aku frust gak ah kan,,,i tot MIL shud more nicer la kan,,,its totally different,,,aku jek yg prasan kot..ntah ah,,,,aku wat bodo jek ah,,,kalau aku layan prasaan aku nih,aku rase leh jadi giler.....

yelar,,bayang kan,,,aku nih dari family yg hu ha hu ha,,,nak duit ker,brg ape ker sume bg,,,sume bende pun humble ,,,takde rules sgt,,,showing love sume open ,,,and tetibe masuk new family nih,,,aku rase cam kejutan budaya kjap...totally different frm my family,,,,everything nak kene jage,,,dari ckp smpi ker ape2 jek ah,,mcm tersekat ah,,,i didn't expect much from his family but my tot meleset sama skali from wat i expected and from that time,i know that i shud be myself,,,live like how i should not on anyone rules,,,i love them as much as my family but on that time that i reallize what my mum said...i'm really appreciate my family now and i thank God that i have such a wonderful family that really understands me,appreciate me, pampers me and support me in everything i do,,,and i love you mama,there's no one can replace you...and aku rase Tuhan tu memang Maha Adil and aku harap aku mempunyai ketabahan yg kuat utk harungi marriage life aku nih...its tough though!

Thanks BFF for all of your advice and i really appreciate it! keep update me on your personal life story since i'm far from you all ya!hehhehe...cheers

Hey BFF, wIsh you all selamat berpuase!

Even though i know it's already 10th days of our fasting days, but i guess it's not too late for me to wish all my BFF out there...Hope you doing well and be grateful that we have a chance once again to celebrate and feel it. Hope this Ramadhan bring you girls lot of luck in everything that you do...Amin!

Enjoyable Week but Tiring

i took 3 days leave because i received a letter from Jabatan Perakaunan Negara (AG) that asked me to go for their Accoun tant General Assessment Centre(AGAC)...at 1st,i really don't want to go because i'm not confident enough,,i'm always lack of confidence when it comes to something important like this...but after being persuaded by my hubby and parents,when i think again...why not i go there..just to have fun,make friends and experience something new even deep in my heart i know that i'm not too qualified but its not wrong to try your luck,rite...so,i went there and here i am,,just coming back from AGAC in Perak...Guess what,,we're the 1st batch that went through the assessment,,,damn,it was tiring but fun..!

A lot of activities that i went through and i think it is good because we have a public speaking,pengucapan awam,meeting,sports,dance and lots more,,,and the best is on the last day of AGAC,we have a parliament debate which is nearly the same as PAC (PTD assessment centre) but a lil bit different...the debate was so much fun until we don't have enough time to end it and dun have any conclusions to made because both side don't want to agree at each other usul...now i know how the parliament is,,,we end it with a taklimat then dismissed,,,i make many friends there and i don't feel afraid anymore..i feel more confidence now,,,why do i have to feel that way...

by the way,i'm going to take a nap now,,my legs feels hurt and really tired,,i'm glad it was over and can't wait to get back to werk with a new spirit!hahahaha,,,,sure aku punyer kerja bertimbun,,,,,gtg now....cheers!

Akhirnyer, dapat gak rase...

Hey BFF!at last,aku ngan hubby dapat gak rase dok umah sendiri..syok betul...well,of course my mum won't agree at first but i need to move on after all,right?korang mesti tak percaye kan..but that's the real fact and i also can't believe it till now...it was hard but makan mase ah nak terime...tp skang dah ok sikit la,my mum kene terima gak..now die plak berebut ngan my in law nak dtg umah kitorg during weekend..aku lak yang pening kpale..kekadang tak tau nak layan yang maner...org tua kan sensitip..kekadang stress gak ah but kene terime ah..thats is marriage life..now aku happy dah dok umah sendiri...nak gaduh pun tak yah macam nak bisik2...hehehhe...so,dua2 pihak tak leh ah nak terase kalo tak balik ker balik ker...easy that way,fair n square...tp aku ari2 balik umah mak aku gak..hehhehe...but i'm more happy now..built my own family n i really hope we changed for good.

I'm tired of being me,,,,,

Hi BFF!!sorry lame menyepi,,,takde mase tul nak update blog nih but since i'm free now,i would like to update about myself..

first of all...about marriage life..
aku gaduh ngan my hubby and i know its not a good thing...aku rase cam die dah makin jauh ngan aku..tak macam dulu,maybe aku tak patut compare but that's what i'm feeling right now..he always busy 24/7!aku tau die penat kene buat 2 keje but aku dah try utk faham tp lelame cam bosan..everything i hv to do alone...maybe aku nih terlampau sensitif la,its true..i admit that but tlg la paham prasaan aku....ade la banyak lg yg aku pendam tp nak wat cemaner kan..he's my husband..he aware of it but still he ask me to be patient..aaarrgghhh!h mmm...sometimes i really dun understand men...its d hardest thing to deal with!

2nd of all,about my werk...
evryone want to leave..how am i going to deal with it??yea,,,we can't stop people from leaving rite but i think ape2 pun kene bersyukur kan cuz ekonomi skang pun tak baper stabil...i love my job, what i do now but i cannot focus in what i'm doing right now....you know why?cuz aku xde HOD then i hv to report to everyone but nobody...multitasking and it make me sick...aku bukan merungut but dah dekat 3 tahun mcm nih...takde aper yg berubah..still same jekk..aku tak tau mcm maner aku leh stuck kat cn...maybe its because my 1st job..aku nak grow with the company but smpi skang aku tak rase ade perubahan..macam maner yer..i need to replan my future planning and need to find my passion..is it too late?but i dunno where to start...hmm..i still can't make a decision for myself..pathetic kan...hahaha..pastuh aku yang penat sendiri..hubby aku suh berenti keje but aku taknak la nanti bosan plak...watever it is,life goes on...

3rd of all,about staying with my mum..
ni lagi satu..tak tau la macam maner nak settle nihhh...dulu yah,skang aku plak..hehhehe...my hubby pun dah panas bontot dah...ingat nak cari umah sewa but i dun think my mum would allow it..ckp psl nak tgk home fair pun dah kene marah,nak pindah camner ler...aku tak kisah kalo myhubby nak pindah..ckp ah ngan mama..hehehhe...sbnrnyer die pun tak berani..tak tau la smpi bile nak mcm nihh..tgk ah,kalo mcm untung bisness banyak,ingat bulan 5 after adek aku abis blaja,nak cari umah sewa..so,parents aku tak sunyi sgt n aku pun tak risau tp tak tau ah..tawakal jek laaa...

aku rs cukup ah tuh pengaduan aku wat mase nih...nanti aku sambung lagi..ade keje sket...muah!















** Within your heart, keep one still, secret spot where dreams may go.

Selesai sudah semuanyer....

Smalam aku dah pergi pejabat Agama Johor..settlekan ape yang patut utk wedding aku..hampes eh kitorg nih..baru nak wat...ye ah..after dah kene bising ngan member2 n family...baru terkedek2 nak pegi..kalo tak,tak tau lar bile aku nak gi..cuz tunang aku tuh Workaholics..susah nak mintak cuti..takut sangat ngan boss die..ala..bukan org lain pun,bakal bapak sedare die gak..susah betul kalo nak suh die cuti...itupun die mintak half day jek...cuz sejak kitorg kat pejabat agama..hp die tak berenti memekak...aku macam dah nak meletop jek kat situ tapi ape nak wat..kene la berkorban...terime jek ah dapat laki yg workaholics!aauuww...i hate that words...

So,part yang paling besh n nervous kat pejabat agama ialah kene interbiu...nasib ustazah tuh tak garang sangat..kalo kene ngan ustaz tuh..macam garang jek...seram aku..tunang aku kene senang jek interbiu..baca 2 kalimah syahadah..alfatihah n rukun nikah..part aku,kene 2 kalimah syahadah..doa qunut n mandi hadas..adeeiihh...part mandi hadas tuh yang takleh nak explain detail..praktikal aku tau ler..hehhehe...nasib lepas...then,g cari kadi sume pastuh dah settle...letih gak ah sebab kene rushing..tunang aku nak g keje..

Akupun tak baper sihat sangat nih..demam selsema tak baik2 lagi..tensen aku...sambung later!

Yaaaahhhhooooo!!!

Hari nih UPSR akan diumumkan.... tapi aku tengok adik aku relaks jek...mak aku lak yang over berdebar2 cam die lak yang amik pekse...tapi memang slalu macam tuh pun kan...kalo result nak kuar,mesti mak lar yang berdebar2...lumrah dunia..hehhehe...kalo aku jadi mak pun,aku camtuh agaknyer...

Anyway,kul 11am tadi mak aku call...aku dah cuak gile ah cuz die menangis2 sambil cakap..."Ya,Fandi dapat 5A....uhukuhukuhuk......"..Ape lagi,aku pun terkena virus cam nak menangis lak...punyer happy giler mak aku adik aku naik pentas amik result...lagi naik lemak ah die pasnih...mintak ape saje...hmm..hampes...aku pun kopak ler...tunggu jek ah die mintak aper...but aku sangat2 bersyukur die dapat result yang bagus..memecah tradisi keluarga aku yang tak penah dapat 5A...akupun 3A 1B jekk..tp ok la kan....

Tak sabar aku nak balik umah,nak tengok reactions mak aku..hehhehe..kepoh giler...mesti ader celebrations nyer weekend nihhh...aaddeeiihh...oklar, nak stop dulu..nak wat keje aku yang berlambak nih....C ya!

"The Love of a family is life's greatest blessings"

Al-Fatihah.......

Aku baru dapat berita dari tunang aku...opah die kat perak baru meninggal semalam...aku shocked gak dengar..maklumler...aku ni fobia sket bab2 org meninggal..nak2 org terdekat...sedih gak ah..opah die ade dtg JB beberape bulan yang lepas ah..aku tak ingat..cuz die nak sangat jumpe aku n tunang aku...aku dah dapat rase dah time tuh..cuz opah die macam lain macam jek..pastu asyik kate takut tak sempat nak tengok...sayu gak aku dengar..terpakse ah time tuh aku g berkampong kat umah tunang aku...1 hari gak ah kat situ melayan opah die...tp aku tak kisah ah...sian gak aku tengok...tp aku tgk time tuh die memang dah uzur...

Mlm semalam gak tunang aku balik perak n family die...Tadi aku call,die kate dah kebumi..semuanyer lancar..takde ape2 buruk yang berlaku..cuaca pun cerah...alhamdulillah..Hopefully semuanyer selamat....

Apepun,at least aku ade memory ngan opah die..aku pun tak sangka die pegi cepat...Aku harap arwah tenang n dietempatkan dikalangan org2 beriman...Al Fatihah...

"Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go."